Self-Care is Necessary for Healing

Pregnancy, postpartum, and parenthood can be such a beautiful, and extremely challenging, time.

Even though many people may feel ‘fine’, and their thinking brains may go into coping mode by comparing (e.g., my experience isn’t as bad as this other person’s) or minimizing (e.g., at least I still have a roof over my head), trauma doesn’t live in the thinking brain.

Trauma resides in our survival brain, where our autonomic functioning is. This includes our trauma responses (i.e., fight, flight, freeze, fawn).

Our responses to reminders of past or current trauma are mostly unconscious and not in our awareness, therefore contributing to people being in a prolonged fight-or-flight state.

Our trauma responses are for our own survival. 

Think about our cave people ancestors: If they encountered a dangerous animal, the threat went past the thinking brain to the survival brain, in order to activate the fight-or-flight response. 

Once the threat was over (i.e., the person made it to safety), they were able to allow themselves to rest in order to heal from the heightened activation state.

The problem with our society today is that we frequently don’t allow ourselves this time to rest and to give our bodies the ability to decompress after activation. 

As a result, we experience prolonged exposure to stress, as well as the negative consequences that result from it (e.g., lower distress tolerance, higher cortisol levels).

Engaging in self-care and taking the time for relaxation are vital for our well-being. 

Through self-care practices, we access our parasympathetic nervous system (i.e., rest and digest) and our bodies can truly heal from the stress we are experiencing. .

In pregnancy, postpartum, and parenthood, we need self-care more than ever. 

Whether it is taking a hot (or cold) shower, going on a long walk, or reading a book, I encourage you all to take at least 5-10 minutes a day to nourish your body, mind, and soul through self-care. 

You are worthy of peace and calm.