8 Things I Would Tell My Newly-Postpartum Self

It is OK to rest.

You just gave birth to a baby. What you did was miraculous and incredible. Your body is still healing. Please sit or lay down. Please eat more food than you think you need.

Please rest.

You have nothing to prove.

Don’t worry about the laundry or the dishes. Your house does not have to be clean right now. You are tired. Your body hurts.

Please allow yourself to only do the most important thing - taking care of yourself and your baby.

You have the right to set boundaries with family and in-laws.

Your experience matters. Your truth matters. If someone said or did something that was upsetting to you, you can absolutely set boundaries with them.

Please do not allow others to take your power.

It is OK to ask for help.

You know the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child.” You have a village who loves you and wants to help.

Please reach out to someone.

It is OK to cry.

Your birth experience may have been painful, traumatic, and jarring. Or you may be missing the person you were before you became a parent. If you are having feelings of sadness about your birth and postpartum, it does not mean you do not love your baby.

Please allow yourself to cry and feel what you are feeling.

It is OK to not exclusively breastfeed.

The average birth parent in the United States exclusively breastfeeds for SIX WEEKS. Mouth ties can happen. Getting a good latch can be challenging. Your supply may be low.

Please know there is no shame in bottle feeding or using formula to nourish your baby.

This difficult time will pass.

The nights feel long, but the sleep feels short. You may not have showered in three days, and you wish you could have a moment to yourself. Everything is a phase. This challenging time is not forever.

Please take things day-by-day, and remember it *will* get better.

You are doing a great job.

You and your baby were meant for each other. The love you share is greater than you have ever known. Day by day, you are getting to know your baby’s needs a little bit more.

Please remember you are doing the best you can.